Dear Speed Seduction® Student,

In my previous post, we explored how you can get more of the kind of women you really want when you master the skills and apply the techniques that boost your girl-getting game.

A lot of it comes from creating her motivation and desire to respond.  We have so far explored five ways to get that initial locking in of attention and desire to respond – analogs, vibe, format, touch, and when “you don’t care that they don’t care.”

And now, here are seven more approaches or techniques that may work for you.

6) Pattern interrupts: doing or saying the unexpected that is slightly puzzling or ambiguous. As in, “Your pirispinals are laterally asymmetrical” Did you just insult her or compliment her?  She can’t tell so it creates curiosity.  Or an unexpected and reframing response to one of her auto-pilot utterances, such as the “Boyfriend Destroyer.”

7) Demonstrating authority in her world: showing that you deeply understand something or can read her. This creates fascination, a great conductive medium across which you can throw anything and get strong responses!

Humor: make ‘er laugh and loosen her up.

9) Demonstrating dominance: Lots of ways to do this. Personally, I prefer to go in with funny dominance. For instance, a while ago I was out with some students. We got in line at a coffee place. A very cute blond was in front of me in line. I turned to my students and said in a very loud, but playful way, “OK, who’s buying me my ice tea?”

The blond laughed. (Just what I was aiming at). So I turned to her and said, “Ok, YOU are buying me my ice tea!”

It’s not always playful dominance but that is how I prefer to START.

10) Non-sequitur: sudden change of subject serves as a pattern interrupt that can get attention.

11) Fractionating among the different vibes: dominant, demonstrating deep understanding, being funny and playful, revealing what you are really thinking and feeling in the moment(authentic)

12) Looks: Yes, believe it or not, some women will just like your looks! Even if you don’t.  Hooray!

The women are waiting.  What, I ask, in the name of Isabella’s ice cream cones, are you waiting FOR?

Peace and piece,
RJ

P.S. If you’re sick and tired of letting sexy, beautiful women pass right in front of you while you sit there virtually paralyzed not knowing exactly what to do or say to meet them, Speed Seduction® 3.0 is your golden ticket to total success!  Try it risk-free for 90 days – click here.

Dear Speed Seduction® Student,

When you “assume” it makes an ass-of-u-and-me.  What happens when you “insist”?

Watch this short video where I share two great attitudes that will help you meet, seduce, and succeed with the women you truly desire:

nopostivethinkingbullshitsmaller-desktop.m4v

Peace and piece,
RJ

P.S. This clip is from our April 2011 3-day seminar in London.  Our next seminar dates are in June, and are in Copenhagen and London.  Don’t miss out, click here for details and to sign up now!

Dear Speed Seduction® Student,

In all areas of life, a key ingredient to success, whatever your definition of that word, is persistence.

Now let’s say you’re persistent, but something keeps going persistently wrong?  Or, looking at it another way, if something is persistently tripping you up or blocking you from claiming your results?

Let’s hear from a student who seems to be able to Sarge only in bars (ironic, I know, given that’s one of the hardest places to Sarge and one of the least recommended places as far as I am concerned):

> Im not afraid to approach women, I’m having trouble getting from right after
> hello and going into pattern at will, Also trouble with state control. I bring
> me old self with me it persistently stays. It sucks, I have had success but only
> in bars mostly that where I’m more anchored in good feeling and in a bar it
> the right place to sarge but outside going along with everyday tasks its
> difficult. Breaking state Im having trouble understanding.If I can get to
> patterns I got em but getting Im having trouble.

So what’s the “big idea” here?The big idea is this: you probably don’t need to add anything in. You probably just have to subtract out whatever internal processes are getting in the way.

You’ve got good feelings and no problem in a bar which is where MOST guys have trouble! So what is NOT going on in your head, in a bar, that DOES go on in your head, elsewhere? Or, what goes on in your head, outside of bar, that is ABSENT when you are in a bar?

What you need to do is subtract out what is getting in your way, when you are NOT in a bar.

Once you identify that, you’re one step closer to no-holds-bar-red success with the women you truly desire.

Peace and piece,
RJ

P.S. Are you sick and tired of letting sexy, beautiful women pass right in front of you while you sit there virtually paralyzed not knowing exactly what to do or say to meet them?  No longer will this be an impediment once you master what I teach in Speed Seduction® 3.0.  Click here to get yours now!

Dear Speed Seduction(R) Student,

The other day, someone left this comment on my blog as well as emailing it to me.  I am going to reproduce it here for you to read and quite frankly do nothing other than ask you: what would YOU tell him?

I’d really like to encourage your participation here, so the person who leaves the best comment gets a 1/2 free Skype consult with me-winner to be announced on the blog.  Here is his post; please read and answer him as best YOU can:

Hey Ross,

I have to say this is all really great stuff! I have been following your lessons (at least these updates and the older stuff I was able to get for free through link provided with the “Up To Speed with Speed Seduction” video series) for quite some time now- since the end of last Fall. However I can’t really seem to integrate any of this into my approaches to women very easily, and I can’t afford to buy any of your “premium” stuff (I’m a broke college student)…

I feel like I should be much better with women than I am- I’m smart, good-looking (women tell me this all the time, even though they say they’re not attracted to me), and fairly successful (I go to an Ivy League school and do pretty well academically). But I feel like a total failure with women- I’m 21 and I’ve never even had my first kiss! Girls my age have always told me they “don’t like my like that” (romantically/sexually), and it’s really caused some problems with my life. A while back, one girl even actually thought I was suicidal because I seemed so upset/depressed about this stuff, and caused some considerable trouble for me by reporting that concern to the authorities! (suicide on campus has been a really big issue here lately, after a recent string of successful student suicides)

I really need some kind of turn-around with my romantic/sexual life!

I know I’m capable of being really good with women because two or three times in my life something has just “clicked” in my head and for a brief moment I was really good at flirting with women- one time this got me a date with a really hot, smart, popular girl when I was in high school that I ended up having to miss because I ended up stuck on a car en route to Vermont with a dead cell phone (she ended up thinking I had stood her up, and spread word through the rest of the high school- killing any remaining chance I had of getting a date while in high school) Another time, here in college, I got a girl not-so-subtly inviting herself back to my place (for a hook-up), but I actually didn’t recognize what she was doing until it was too late and I said something really stupid that was a huge turn-off (she was really cold to me from then on and never brought up what had happened). So I know it’s possible for me to get the kind of results I want with women, or something even better! But I just can’t seem to do it and it’s destroying my life bit by bit…

I know I do a lot of stuff wrong with women, but I just don’t know how to go about fixing any of it… I know I also do some stuff very right with women, but it’s much harder for me to pick out what those things are… I’ve gotten really desperate to try and find something that works for me, and I’ve tried everything. I even created a profile on several dating websites (my profile on OK Cupid is Northstar1989 if anyone wants to take a look at how I present myself to the world and see what I do wrong…), but NOTHING, and I mean NOTHING seems to work for me….

Please help me Ross. If there’s anything you can do, any advice you could give me, I’d really appreciate it.

Regards,
Blake

P.S. I’ll also ‘CC this to the e-mail address I have for you from the Up to Speed videos, rj@seduction.com ,in case you don’t notice this comment.

Dear Speed Seduction® Student,

It happens to beginners… AND from time to time, even to skilled Speed Seduction® masters.  (VERY rarely, but it can happen to ANYONE, so don’t beat yourself up, just keep reading).

You know the feeling.  You see her.  She’s hot.  Real hot. You’ve seen her in your dreams, and now here she is.  Sitting alone.  Wearing that svelte dress that was sewn just for her scintillatingly salacious body.  She might as well be wearing a sign that says “Come Hither” with your name on it. It’s “go” time.  Time to take that bold step forward.

But then it hits you.

First it’s like a weight in the pit of your stomach.  Then it grows, moving up your solar plexus through your chest and up to the back of your throat. Your notice that your face feels a little warm as well. Your heart beat increases, and your breathing becomes more rapid. Your feet also feel heavy, almost like they’re stuck to the floor.

You know how this story ends, right?  MISSION ABORTED.

Well guess what…

…That’s all about to end!

Here’s the key: view this as an opportunity to learn HOW your body produces anxiety.

The next time this happens, just relax, and rather than trying to fight it or push through it, PAY ATTENTION.

Notice where IN YOUR BODY the feelings of anxiety first arise. Where do they start? Where do they spread to? What is the quality of the feeling… is it cold? Warm? Does it run only on the surface or deep inside?

What happens to the rest of your bodily awareness when this happens?  What are you doing with your breathing?  Just observe.

DO NOT TRY TO CHANGE ANY OF IT!

Just observe it, objectively and carefully. Don’t try to get into action or talk to any girl. Just observe your bodily response WITHOUT JUDGMENT.

That is the first step. Do this and see if you can find your way over to her now.

Peace and piece,
RJ

P.S. In our live, 3-day seminars we do numerous interactive exercises just like these that blast you through stuck points and get you on the smooth street-way to Sargy success.  Get your Seduction ass to Chicago (just 3 weeks away), London or Copenhagen (next month) or our other cities this year.  Click here for our 3-day Speed Seduction® seminars now!

Dear Speed Seduction® Student,

One of my readers who receives our Steaming Hot Seduction Secrets newsletter is asking what, for many of you, is an important question.

He knows that I don’t recommend going to “meat markets” or “pick up joints” because they’re usually too noisy so you can’t work your Sargy magic, there’s too many people around, and besides, women will have their guards up because they know guys are there to hit on them.

I also don’t suggest meeting women online.  On dating sites, again, her guard will be up, plus what have I said about introducing any form of “dating” frames with women before you sleep with them?  Even on f@@king Facebook.  Those chat rooms and “naughty boxes”, you don’t know if, in her mind, she’s chatting with YOU, or some idealized vision of what she thinks you might be.

So, where are you going to effortlessly approach and meet women this weekend?

One of the best ways to meet women is to encounter them during the normal activities you engage in, connecting with women while they go through their normal activities.   For example…

• You think there might be some wet, willing women at the car wash?
• What about the succulent hottie standing next to you in line at the checkout?
• Maybe she’s your “friend” now, but did you know you can use the friend zone to get her in bed?
• Going out of town and flying solo?  Or, you’re staying close to home, but your wingman isn’t around to back you up this weekend?  Don’t worry, you’re covered either way.

And, yes, I’ll address the elephant in the room.  You know the old cliche about what you’ll find at the produce section in the supermarket?  Well, it’s not a cliche.  My students in southern California (where I’m from) know that you’ll usually find some fresh fare at Ralphs.

That should give you some ideas.

And I better not hear about how you got some chick’s number this weekend so you could call her up and ask her out on a date, unless she gave it to you AFTER catching her breath from the whirlwind flight on the Cape Carnal-Veral Shuttle.

Get out there and make it happen.

Peace and piece,
RJ

P.S. My recommendation for today is that you get out there and DO it.  But if you need some instant, right-now access to some great videos that teach various aspects of Speed Seduction®, just click here to grab it.

Dear Speed Seduction® Student,

Really… how was your weekend with women?

Was it a vaginally-victorious, ripe-for-harvest, 69-acre field of moist pink abundance?

Did you meet a great new woman, easily and effortlessly, despite any imperfections in yourself or in her, and powerfully capture her interest and create a new space where the two of you could take things, together, in a new direction?

Did you get laid?

If some hottie threw you a curveball – gave you a nasty glare, shot you down cold before you had a chance to work your Sargy magic (or Magick), or otherwise threw a wrench in the gears – did you know what to do?  How to handle it?  How to turn things around your way to still get the results you want?

OK, so maybe you’ve been seeing someone.  Have you slept with her yet? Things heatings up between you two?

(Or you three, if she, like her salaciously succulent sorority sister, is the freaky girl that many of my students would like to meet at least once… or maybe again and again)?

I get it – maybe you’re in a serious, committed relationship and this is indeed the woman you think you might want to marry.  After all, you did take her home to meet your momma and it was already like your parents “didn’t lose a son, but gained a daughter”. 

Is it a relationship, or a real-hate-shun-ship? Are you sure?  Do you know what to do if you really like her but so far it seems like you real-hate too much?

Seriously, let me know.  I want to hear from you.  Leave a comment below, please.

Peace and piece,
RJ

P.S. If your actual weekend with women didn’t quite add up to the “perfect HB10″ equation I described above, click here and/or click here to learn two ways you can improve things, starting now.  Today.  Getting the ball rolling for wetter, wilder, wonderful-er weekends with women.

Dear Speed Seduction® Student,

According to my customer service manager, one of the biggest things that students ask is where can they get even more word-for-word patterns.

You’ll find them in many of my courses – for example, I cover “Twin Brothers” at great length on the Irresistible Arousal DVD that’s included with the Power Pack.

But for today, instead of “more” patterns, let me state that most guys would be better served by learning to use the patterns they already know more powerfully.

I would also add: the best “pattern” is to evoke a woman’s own responses and processes and use them.

In this respect, the most capable Speed Seducer might be MISTAKENLY viewed as “passive”, in that, rather than seeking to create something that is not there, he instead seeks to evoke what IS there, stimulate it to life, seize hold of it and direct it to his intent.

In other words, we stay VERY strong in our intent, yet we use what is given to us by the other person, once we have them sufficiently stimulated to be responding in useful ways…from the deeper structures and processes in her body/mind.

We tune in…listen…use our intuition..use our ability to stimulate the useful processes and responses in her to life. We may seem to the untrained to be “sensitive” but in fact, we are providing a STRONG lead the entire time.

To balance this strong intent…STRONGLY LEADING…yet being open to her responses. THAT is the balance.

This balance can take months to get good at, and years to master, but once you get it, it becomes very hard NOT to attract.

Now, what are the things that get in the way of this? How can we, like sculptors, remove what doesn’t belong in us so we can get to the essence of the skills?

Removing What Is In The Way

First, we must remove our old ways of seeing women. We can see like any other guy, the things that all guys appreciate: boobs, butts, legs, lips, vulva. All good, all fine, all right…IN THE RIGHT PLACE AND TIME.

We must also learn, however, to see differently and to listen in a different way.

Talk to a woman. Stimulate her mind and imagination in a certain way, and within 2 minutes she is telling you how she can feel her uterus contracting when she is attracted to someone and you get the sound she makes to herself when she feels it..not because she says, “Oh, and I make THIS sound… ummmmmmmmmmmm… when I feel that.”

No, I’m just listening, and as she describes the process, she makes the sound at the end of it. Ummmmmmmmmm.

Now, I am listening for what I can use and NOT what stimulates ME!

Ummmmmmmmmmm is HER verbal anchor for that state.

So, for a while anyway, we must learn to put aside our own stimulation or turn it down. That is the first thing many guys most remove.

Second, we must learn to remove old beliefs about what we have to do to attract women and instead learn to look at HER processes and responses. Like the good Lord, SHE will provide what we need…IF we know how to look and listen for it and how to stimulate it into life..and HOW to use it once we have it.

Listen AND Lead

A student of mine told me he was speaking with a woman on the phone with someone with whom he’d had some brief conversations but they’d been playing phone tag.

He took the lead and said, “Why don’t we make a firm plan to meet for an hour so we can explore what is obviously intriguing us both?”

He suggested time. She said, “okayyyyyyyyy” but he noticed it was not a firm, enthusiastic “ok”. He NOTICED. He used his skill to listen. Then he moved to a STRONG lead.

He said, “you know, I want to make sure this is something we both enthusiastically want and “okayyyyyyy” is not the same as “ok…YES!”. THAT’S what I need to hear if we are going to do this. So why don’t we try later in the evening? 8PM I will meet you at _____________

She tried suggesting another place. He said, “Is it quiet? I want a quiet place to talk, so let’s meet at _____________ as I said before”.

She said, ENTHUSIASTICALLY and with FULL agreement, “OK! I’m looking forward to it!”

Now, this is a SIMPLE example… Not dripping with juice or phone sex, but simple and important. He NOTICED her response, brought it out to the surface, and redirected things WITH A STRONG LEAD.

You see, macho doesn’t work because MACHO DOESN’T NOTICE OR LISTEN. So it only works on women who are dumb or weak or destroyed enough to not want to be heard.

Just listening doesn’t work, because WOMEN WANT A STRONG LEAD. You must listen to her responses then STRONGLY LEAD her using them and what you’ve learned from them.

Do both.

Peace and piece,
RJ

P.S. Among the many things you’ll learn in Speed Seduction® 3.0 is how to use your language to create states of attraction, lust, fascination and utter desire, with any woman you want – and do it so she thinks it’s HER idea!  Click here to see the many other things, also, and claim your copy right now.

Dear Speed Seduction® Student,

Only one thing pleases me more to hear that a student is kicking ass and taking names when it comes to scoring BIG with the ladies.

What could please me more than that, you ask?

Hearing that a student is actually helping out a fellow student to get amazing results.

Look: when I think back to what an incredibly tongue-tied, nerve-wracked, chicken-chokin’ loser I used to be with women, it makes me want to cry.

So, when a student gets marvelous results, and then helps another student achieve the same, well, I’m proud, delighted beyond delight’s sweet delight.

So, imagine my good feelings when I read the following email, from an attendee of a previous 3-day seminar in London, UK (note: the DVDs he mentions are all inside the Speed Seduction@ Power Pack):

Hi Ross,

I thought the story of what happened last night might be interesting for Some of you – especially the newer SS students.

After the London seminar the Irish lads decided that we should get together and start to really push these skills forward.

After a number of bars we were all off the mark and had already got some great responses. Things  were off to a great start – the guys had gone from not being able to open, to using blurt-outs, intuitive openers, humorous approaches, and some great sincerity, which we learned from the Gold Walk Ups DVD.

The more women that were opened, the further the old beliefs faded. THE WOMEN LOVED THESE CHARMING  GUYS.

I helped one student, Dan, with some of the exercises on your Fear Into Charisma DVD.

Here is the REALLY INTERESTING THING – he got some great smiles, some kino from these women, and out of about 50 approached women, only 2 semi negative responses. The energy was grounded before going out, and his state, energy, and awareness were totally controlled and supercharged.

After this, women were approaching  him, and there was no more fear of approaches – he hit the 100 openers’ mark by the end of the night.

Then came Selig.

This guy was amazing, he really got into the ritual before hand, and we reversed  some of the energy surrounding his former fear of clubs when we arrived at the place.

After a little while Selig had hit 60 approaches. At this stage there was no stopping him.

Selig had moved from being afraid to speak to women, to a guy who was magnetic, charming, intuitive, and dynamic in a little under 5 hours. He broke the 100 approaches mark by the end of the night.

I’m sure the guys will have their own stories to post in more detail, but suffice to say, approaches are no longer a problem.

John Stein – Cork, Ireland

RJ here again.  John, what can I say? A huge “right on” for helping out your fellow Speed Seduction® students.  May you always find women with warm hearts, firm bods, and lots of moist pink relief!

Peace and piece,
RJ

P.S. Want to overcome YOUR fear of approaching women and know the 4 different ways to meet them anytime, anywhere, and never worry about what to say?  This is one of many topics we’ll be covering in our Speed Seduction® 3-Day Seminars.

P.P.S. For the “in the box” version that gets you in HER box more often, you’ll want Speed Seduction® 3.0.

Either way, let me know when you top meeting 100 women a night!

Dear Speed Seduction® Student,

Yesterday I shared with you Part 1 of the letter from my student who set the intention of approaching 100 women and the expectation that most of them would shoot him down.

In Part 2, let’s explore some of the techniques that helped him in his quest.

As you read the rest of his letter, pay special attention to his brilliant advice on overcoming the fear of “failure”.

Now here’re a few techniques you may want to use:

Talking with other smart guys about women: I cannot say enough about this. Just learning what others are doing while doing the above is both encouraging as well as enlightening. I just want to thank the thoughtful people who post quality emails … some of us really appreciate it.

Self-reward and -analysis: Always pat yourself in the back after making an approach or every few approaches. It works. It sounds funny but you feel better when you tell yourself ‘good job’ and give yourself a pat in the back.

Every, say 5 approaches analyze what you did… think how you could have done it concretely better… and replay in your mind how you’d have done it. DON’T analyze every time, do it every say 5 times.

Women are random and if you analyze it each time you’ll NOT see the real pattern. No pun intended. But the exercise (AGAIN) is not to get better, although you naturally will, but just to get across the X number of getting shot-down.

Fear of failure and safety: Early on I sat down and asked myself what in the world was holding me back from approaching beautiful (physically, intellectually, spiritually) women and making their lives sheer beauty, wonder, delight… and I realized… it was just a simple fear of failing.

What if I make a fool out of myself? What if I fall on my face? What if I just annoy her? Being someone who’s successful at a lot of things he’s tried in life this was a BIG one.

But then after some thought I realized it was a paradox. THE BIGGEST FAILURE IS TO FEAR FAILURE. If you fear failure, then you’re GUARANTEED to fail every time.

Think about it. Think about this for long enough and it’ll BLOW your mind AND any fear of failure you have out of the water. DRILL on any such feelings with this paradox.

If you fear failure, YOU WILL FAIL EACH AND EVERY TIME. It’s a complete guarantee. So THAT FEAR IS ITSELF the BIGGEST FAILURE.

Secondly, often we want to be ‘safe.’ But usually, safe from what?? Safe from success, safe from learning how to move women in ways that may astonish us. Do you want to be safe from success? Really? Think about your whole life … do you want to be safe repeating that SAME pattern?

If these are issues for you, I’d try meditate on these two ideas, after some breathing exercises, and you may find, like I did, that meditation affecting your whole life timeline, going to the deepest crevices of your being, and you will be decontaminated from those thoughts in a couple hours or days.

Don’t be surprised to see your whole physiology changing. This is not just pattern language… my whole body felt it. Use the titanium drill of the paradoxes to destroy those filthy mental microbes.

Best regards, Stephen/Angelo

Ok. Ross here again. This student really got it when he talked about the paradox of fearing failure actually being the biggest guarantee of failure.

You see, as I have said before, it is the meaning you assign to things that determines how you will feel about them. If you assign the meaning that you MUST “succeed” with every beautiful girl you see, you are going to drive yourself nuts with all sorts of unneeded fear and stress.

When you assign the right meaning to things; that you are just practicing and you are intending to fall on your face, just to practice, suddenly it loses its importance and paradoxically, you do a lot better with a lot less effort.

My own personal beliefs about meeting and seducing women are, “Let’s go have some fun with her and find out what she’s like” and “I will either get what I want or learn what I need to in order to get what I want or even better next time”.

Try THOSE on for size, and see what happens to any fear of approaching women.

Peace and piece,
RJ

P.S. Ready to claim 2011 as your Vaginal Victory Year?  Inside the Speed Seduction® Secret Training Collection you will find over 120 tightly focused, girl-pulling video lessons, including an entire segment on “Blasting Through Stuck Points” – and much much more.  Click here to claim your lifetime, instant online access now.