Dear Speed Seduction® Student,

One of the tricky things when you get good with Speed Seduction® is the thorny problem of having women fall for you and fall for you hard, when all you want is a little bit of fun.

As guys, we have to be aware that even the most bitter, cynical, hardened woman can have her heart burst wide open and her feelings of wanting to be loved really come to the surface when she is properly seduced.

Let’s face it: sex can make all of us feel very vulnerable, and most especially so with many, if not most women.

To illustrate my point, let me share a note from a student facing this situation:

Dear Ross and Bros:

Went out with a young lady I met on the internet on Saturday.

Any way, one Twin Brothers pattern led to another and we ended up back at her place.  No need to go into the details, but when I left we both had big grins on our faces.

The reason I feel a little guilty is that I haven’t called her since.  I’m pretty sure that it won’t do her too much harm, but also pretty sure that it won’t make her feel too good and won’t do her self esteem too much good either.

Although I’m not that interested in developing a relationship with her, I would prefer to be able to  walk away knowing that, at the very least no damage has been done, however small that might be.

Now, I was pretty honest with her and didn’t promise her anything other than an interesting evening.  I did say that I would call her, and  later in the week I shall.  But what would be interesting from you guys would be any thoughts on how to set her up on the date so that they see the evening as a fun, exciting event and are happy not to expect too much after it.

RJ: The key here is to be honest about your intentions if she asks.  The second thing is, if you are not looking for an incredible connection, but just a roll in the hay, don’t use “connection” patterns.

I teach there are 4 doorways into any woman’s mind and emotions:

1. Getting her visualizing vividly.
2. Getting her to feel strong emotional connections
3. Getting her to feel strong, pleasurable body sensations
4. Getting to her core value structures

If you sense a woman wants too much from you, commitment–wise or is looking for than what you want, do not use doorways 2 and 4. They create a very strong emotional bond with most women.

You can use them, lightly, but mostly I’d lean on doorways 1 and 2. There are plenty of patterns to pretty much guarantee you can get in without creating deep emotional bonds.

Of course, if a girl is desperate and needy enough, she will CREATE those bonds, even though you never used any patterns at all! That’s when we can get into some trouble even though we proceeded with care. The problem isn’t with us, but with our “subject”; she’s just too friggin’ needy to deal with it.

If you sense you have a girl who is on the needy edge like this, it might be better to just let her slide and NOT have sex with her.

How’s that for having a life of real choice: you actually have so much variety and choice with women that you can feel great being able to say NO to a girl instead of it being the other way around! Imagine that!

Peace and piece,
RJ

P.S. Emotional connection patterns are VERY powerful. They do to women what high heels, push up bras, and boob jobs do to use men; they make the subject loose control!  Use them with caution.

For over 120 laser-focused, tight-trim-triumphant video modules, plus some great bonuses including the famous Buddy To Bedmate System AND some bonuses that we haven’t even announced yet, click here to crack open the Secret Training Collection and claim your vaginal victory in 2011.

Dear Speed Seduction® Students And Fans,

Recently I received an e-mail from a student who is in a sort of purgatory with a woman he met a few weeks ago.

I’ll let him explain it in his own words:

Hey Ross, there is this hottie (I’d say about an HB8) who I’ve met up with a few times.  She’s kind of shy, but intelligent and fun once I get her to loosen up.  The first meet-up was a nice evening at a coffee shop.  The second, we hung out for a while at a quiet little saloon near her apartment.  The third time, we went to dinner.  Now, not only is this not going in the direction I want it to, but her behavior is perplexing.

The third time, I had planned a “Part II” but she seemed distracted the whole time, and even said “can we go?” as soon as the dinner was over.  So I dropped her off and figured it was “Exit, Stage Left” time for this guy.  Fair enough.  Yet, not 30 minutes later she was texting me about what a wonderful time she had and when can we do it again, and all that.  I think I want to see her again, but not if her plan is for us to have dinner once a week, which seems to be where she is trying to take this, which is what I am resisting.

I guess what I’m asking is, how do I determine if she is simply viewing me as her “meal ticket” (literally) or if she might be playing hard to get, just shy, wanting to go to the next step but not finding her own reasons to get there and not knowing how to ask me, etc.?

First of all: I think this confusion could trigger some very supplicating behavior on your part if you don’t watch it.  You’ve already bought her dinner and you didn’t mention the part where you banged her so I’ll assume you haven’t yet. You’re already headed down that slippery slope, one nudge away from a free-fall and you better hope you don’t get splinters in your ass if the slope is wooden.

Hey, your emotions are on the line here and your clarity too. You want to move this to the next level and you think she’s trying to corral you into being her standing “dinner date.”  If you sense something is up, CALL HER ON IT in a firm, calm, and relaxed way.

The bottom line is: only she can tell you what is going on. You can approximate or guess, but that is all it is.

So, if you can’t get your primary outcome (getting her enthusiastic to fuck you) what steps can you take, what moves can you make to AT LEAST MOVE IN THE DIRECTION OF THE KIND OF MAN YOU WANT TO BE AND THE KIND OF MAN YOU ARE ALREADY EVERDAY BECOMING? WHAT MOVES WILL BEST STRETCH YOU IN THE MOST USEFUL WAYS?

Peace and piece,
RJ

P.S. Need to find your way out of the “pattern” of buying drinks at bars or clubs hoping that will get women to like and sleep with you, or taking women on expensive dinner dates hoping that’ll get them in your bed?  Or, worse yet, avoiding falling into this “trap”? All of this, and more, is inside Speed Seduction® 3.0.  Click here to get yours now!

Dear Speed Seduction® Students and Fans,

My recent posts on women who “run hot and cold” have struck quite a nerve.

I’m getting a ton of e-mails and responses, so I know this is an issue that many smart guys like you, including those in my Speed Seduction® Coaching Program, need assistance getting handled.

Now, talk about “hot and cold” – this next letter comes from a student who is Sarging on a woman who goes from naming the kids and planning weekends with the in-laws to not returning his calls, just like that… and he just recently met her!

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The woman in particular is an attractive, 25 yr old small-business owner who seemed to open up very quickly. I met her friends and family right away and we spent a lot of time together. She talked about children’s names and eluded to “our in-laws.” She almost disappeared July 4th and within a week of extreme distance said “you’re not like anyone I’ve ever dated and I don’t know why I’m pushing away what I truly want.”

She bought me gifts and a card the second time we went out, text me many times throughout the day and seemed so sweet, compassionate and just wonderfully feminine.

I’m not sure what went wrong but it sucks, bad. What do you guys think? Did I kill the attraction?

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First of all, what does “open up very quickly” mean? DID YOU F@@K HER? DID YOU F@@K HER? DID YOU F@@K HER? (That’s a yes or no question – you did or you didn’t.)

Frequently in the “Steaming Hot Seduction Secrets” ezines I hammer the point that “dating is what you do with women you’re already sleeping with!” Why?

Because when the interaction turns to “dating,” women instinctively pull out their “checklist” of what the “perfect man” is and start rating whether you are “her type.” If you have not yet connected with her emotionally and set the “anchors” that make any “checklist” irrelevant, you don’t want to be “dating” her.

For the same reason, I’m not in a hurry to meet family and friends. It puts too much “meaning” on things, and immediately that often triggers a woman’s “is he REALLY the one” fractionation / emotional interruption mechanism.

Now, she’s talking about kids’ names and in-laws that early on? That means she is trying out that kind of thinking because she thinks it is how she SHOULD be thinking instead of wanting to go out with her girlfriends, get laid, have fun, etc. She’s trying to convince herself.

Right now, you’re in knots from her “running hot and cold” (the gifts and cards, followed by the “extreme distance”) because you are hooked on the validation and attention. So when she pulls it away, you freak out, get clingy, drive her away, instead of being aware of that response as it first arises and being able to redirect.

It’s time to break the “hot and cold” cycle caused by your need for validation by this (or ANY) woman, and find the woman (or women) who will just want consistent, steaming-hot fun.

Peace and piece,

RJ

P.S. Starting now, forget about ever again being confused by a woman’s emotional 180s, her fluctuations between wanting you and pushing you away, her last minute buyers remorse, contradictory signals, sudden loss of interest and other up until now deeply frustrating and seemingly irrational actions.

With what I teach you throughout the 7 DVDs and 11 CDS of Speed Seduction® 3.0, you’ll be in charge as the effortless seduction architect of every interaction and situation.

Claim yours now, and stop letting her “give it and take it away” – for good!

Dear Speed Seduction® Students and Fans,

About a week ago on my blog, I told you the story of the student who was facing challenges from a hot babe who kept cranking his faucet knob by “running hot and cold,” with the end result that she wasn’t cranking his other knob.

Last night, I received an e-mail from one of you who tells a similar tale, but with an interesting twist. And it got me thinking. So, let me share it with you now along with some more insights to help you create irresistible arousal and avoid the trap of “getting cranked”:

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My situation is that me and this incredible babe I’ve been seeing are probably more in the category of “intimate” in the sense that we are not just flirting and being sexual but there is also lots of holding hands and hugs, etc., and I have always stayed the night instead of it just being “hit and run.” We dont see that much of each other – maybe about once a week – so I can’t say things are really serious. Although, what I would like to know from her is would she like it to be serious!

However, and this is the big BUT…. I like affection, I like intimacy and the problem lies in that I will often if not always find myself initiating kissing with her, and sometimes I go to kiss her and she kind of doesn’t react at all, like she holds her mouth still, which I find weird. She is also texting me alot saying she can’t wait to get her hands on me and other flirty stuff. But when we are together in person she is far more reserved.

In the past, I would chase girls or frighten them away (especially the the ones I like), hence I want to learn from my mistakes and not do it again.

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I have three rules to share, or rather, axioms:

Rule/Axiom #1:

CONFUSED PEOPLE BEHAVE IN CONFUSING WAYS.

It sounds to me like this lady can’t tell what she wants, from what she’s getting, from what she thinks she SHOULD want, etc etc.
You’re spending the night on the “every so often” occasions you see her. She acts all excited with anticipation when there’s a date planned, but then when you kiss her, she doesn’t move her lips?

Rule/Axiom #2:

IN ANY CONFLICT BETWEEN WHAT A WOMAN SAYS AND WHAT A WOMAN DOES, PAY ATTENTION AND GIVE WEIGHT TO WHAT SHE ****DOES****

As a Seduction master, it’s your job to receive and interpret the “vibe” she puts out, and feed it back to her in a way that gets her hot and bothered and inserting you into her fantasies, so when she lives them out, she lives them out with you.

Rule/Axiom #3:

WOMEN ARE CHAOTIC SYSTEMS. AS SUCH, WHAT THEY WANT AND WHAT THEY “RESPOND” TO MAY VARY FROM DAY TO DAY, WEEK TO WEEK, EVEN HOUR BY HOUR, DEPENDING ON ALL SORTS OF ENVIRONMENTAL FACTORS, HER OWN INTERNAL HORIZONTAL AND VERTICAL FRACTIONATION PROCESSES, HEALTH/MONTHLY CYCLE, etc.

Again, you need to remain in control of the situation and remember also that a woman’s first (or current) response is rarely an indicator of what’s “final.” Using Speed Seduction®, you have the power to influence that to help her find her way to you – assuming she is, indeed, open and willing. (And if not, you do “Exit, Stage Left!” and Sarge on the next hottie you see!)

Peace and piece,

RJ

P.S. Starting now, forget about ever again being confused by a woman’s emotional 180s, her fluctuations between wanting you and pushing you away, her last minute buyers remorse, contradictory signals, sudden loss of interest and other up until now deeply frustrating and seemingly irrational actions.

With what I teach you throughout the 7 DVDs and 11 CDS of Speed Seduction® 3.0, you’ll be in charge as the effortless seduction architect of every interaction and situation.

Claim yours now, and start using your power to guide the path of her desires – TOWARD you!